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Minichan

Topic: Minichanfic: The Final Countdown.

Green !BEERiVqJJw started this discussion 8 months ago #60,692

Chapter 1: I'm gay lol
Falco whipped out his 10 inch penis and Green new he was in for a treat. "This reminds of us whence we first met" said Green. "I love you 5ever Green :)" said Falco. Green and Falco shared a warm embrace as Green playfully nibbled Falco's ear. Green buttered Falco's anus and did the humpnig then they went to bed. Green woke up in the middle of the night and went to pour out some Tesco Value Cider when he was startled by a ghost. "Brie, is that you?". The ghost nodded, " aye, it is I. Green, you don't have much time. The timeloops are in danger. You don't have much time". Green discombobulated, "didn't we save and fix the timeloops though?". Brie nodded, "they are in danger again though". Green dropped his cider, " it is time" he said...

Anonymous B joined in and replied with this 8 months ago, 3 minutes later[^] [v] #769,409

@OP
Why don't you wipe your shitty arse, you British gobshite.

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) replied with this 8 months ago, 35 seconds later, 3 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #769,410

@previous (B)
Nice madpost.

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) double-posted this 8 months ago, 1 day later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #769,677

Chapter 2: Matt and the fat
Matt was nervous, he had just flew in from America and boy were his arms tired. He had arrived in Kunming to meet the leader of Falun Dafa Gong and his paxkage was ready. He called for a rickshaw and travelled to the building. He did the secret knock amd was beckoned in. "Mr Miller, we have been expecting you". Matt followed a gentleman up the stairs and into an office. He took a seat and waited for supreme leader. Supreme leader walked in, "do you have the package?" he asked. Matt nodded, "do you have the money?". Supreme leader nodded, Matt was still uneasy however, "what do you plan to do with the nuclear bomb?". Supreme leader laughed, " we plan to blow up Kunming city and wipe out Falun Dafa Gong". Matt became aghast, "I'm all for commiting terrorist acts for the glory of Falun Dafa Gong, but this is too far!" he shouted. Supreme leader took off his mask. "Sk!" shouted Matt, "what have you done with Supreme leader?". Sk got his servant to wheel in a corpse. Matt almost vomitted at the gory sight, Supreme leader looked like his stomach exploded. " What di-did you do?" Matt stuttered. Sk chortled maniacally, "he farted himself to death. Now, Matt, I suggest you hand over the bomb or the same fate will befall you"...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) triple-posted this 8 months ago, 20 hours later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #769,917

Chapter 4: I'm gay lol
Fake anon tenderly kissed Killer Lettuce's forehead as Killer Lettuce tenderly kissed Fake anon's foreskin. "Lets go all the way" whispered Killer Lettuce. "No!" said Fake anon, "it is haram. I want to save our special moment for our wedding tomorrow". Killer Lettuce kissed Fake anon on the cheek and shared a hug with him before he went to eat a pasty and go to bed. Fake anon went to bed and had sweet dreams of the upcoming wedding...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) quadruple-posted this 8 months ago, 12 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #769,919

Chapter 2: Matt and the fat
Matt tentatively gripped the briefcase, "I can't let you kill all these people and destroy Falun Dafa Gong!" said Matt. Sk laughed, "I'm afraid you have no choice. Henchmen, prepare the farting virus!". Matt looked for am escape, when suddenly a hole in the fabric of space appeared. A brilliant white flash appeared in the room. "No!" said Matt astonished, "it can't be! It is the McWalter entity! I thought you collapsed in to a singularity. You must have been so white that your whiteness caused a white hole and brought you back into existence!". McWalter winked, "man, I'm hungry". McWalter ate a hole in the wall through which he and Matt escaped. "Where's the McDonald's" asked McWalter. Matt laughed, "fried rat and sewer oil is the delicacy here. I heard it from an expert on China". Matt chucked McWalter a tie, "now get changed. We have a wedding to attend!"...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) quintuple-posted this 8 months ago, 1 hour later, 1 day after the original post[^] [v] #769,933

This chapter is dedicated to the memory of Killer Lettuce.
Fake anon was nervous, the big day had finally come. It was a sunny day, the perfect weather for an outdoors wedding. Everybody from minichan was there, even a few people from tinychan. Kimmo had also come to pay his respects. Everybody took their seats. Ks was crying pure meth, "I'm no good at weddings he sobbed". Postmortem was wearing no clothes but a bowtie as a mark of respect. Green, Bert, Meta and Matt had managed to go the whole morning without a single drink. Suddenly, the wedding theme played as Killer Lettuce walked down the aisle in a rainbow coloured dress (a symbol of his love for multiculturalism). He got to the podium and r04r began the wedding proceedings. " Do you take Killer Lettuce as your wife?" she asked Fake anon. Fake anon smiled and put on the ring, "I do". "Do you take sexy Mark as your husband?" she asked Killer Lettuce. "I do" he replied. "I now pronounce you man and wife, you may now kiss the bride" said r04r. Fake anon reached in to kiss Killer Lettuce but the sound of gunshot filled the air. "NO!" said Fake anon as blood ran down from Killer Lettuce's chest. "You shits. You never cared about me or my second puberty" Nexi shouted snidely. "Nexi you bastard!" retorted Fake anon. Kimmo pulled out his laser pistol and shot at Nexi but it was too late, he had disappeared. Killer Lettuce continued bleeding out, "he's..dying....Jim.." said Bert. Fake anon grabbed r04r by the shoulders, "there must be something we can do. The holographic pasty?". r04r shook her head, "it was too badly damaged. There is nothing I can do". Killer Lettuce struggled to breathe. Green came up to Killer Lettuce, "twat him one for me mate he said". Fake anon embraced Killer Lettuce in his arms. "I have always loved you" said Fake anon, flooding with tears. Fake anon kissed Killer Lettuce on the lips and Killer Lettuce gasped his last words "NERD" before he slipped off into the atheist abyss...

Anonymous C joined in and replied with this 8 months ago, 14 hours later, 2 days after the original post[^] [v] #770,086

@previous (Green !BEERiVqJJw)

No ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) replied with this 8 months ago, 3 days later, 5 days after the original post[^] [v] #771,343

The party all arrived at Killer Lettuce's funeral. Fake anon was crying very much, "now I will be a virgin forever!" he wailed. Meta laid a rose on the coffin. A few minichan posters said their farewells, "he loved his Cornish heritage", began Svet, "I would always destroy him and his liberal views in arguments, causing him to go quiet, but he was a worthy adversary". " He wanted to free Cornwall from the oppressive English bastards" said Green, "but he wanted to bow down to the oppressive EU bastards. He also loved his Muslims and crappy amimes. He will be missed". Fake anon said his farewells, "we used to joke about Halo and I would call him NERD, but I loved him. Goodbye my cornish pasty". The whole of minichan cried, "he was also a faggot!" someone shouted. "Nexi!" gasped Fake anon as he ran up to xim and punched xim in the face. "You insensitive piece of shit. How dare you show your juggalo face here". Nexi started to run towards his ship and fly off. r04r threw a tracking magnet onto Nexi's ship. "r04r, there must be something we can do?" asked Fake anon. "Ugh" began r04r, "I have been working on a prototype reptilian ship but it is not finished yet. It is faster and more manoeuvrable than Nexi's ship, but it is not as strong. In a fight you wouldn't last long". " It'll have to do!" replied Fake anon, "we can't let Nexi get away!". r04r used the remote control feature to summon the ship. "Only 7 people will be able to fit in there" she said. "I'll pilot it!" said Kimmo, "I'm the best pilot you got". Green and Falco stepped forward, "we'll go to". Meta also stepped forward, "and my axe". Matt and Bert winked, "you'll need....some party..peeps". The crew got it the ship and Kimmo set pursuit of Nexi...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) double-posted this 8 months ago, 13 hours later, 6 days after the original post[^] [v] #771,618

Kimmo tailed Nexi around the solar system. Nexi opened a comm channel, "how are you following me?" he asked. Kimmo winked, "r04r put a magnet on your ship. You being a juggalo, do not understand how the fuck does it work?". Nexi initiated evasive manoeuvres and flew through the rings of Saturn. Nexi's shields held, but the crew's ship took some damage, however, Kimmo managed to agilely pilot it. Then Nexi initiated warp drive and Kimmo did likewise. "He is heading into that nebula made of alcohol https://phys.org/news/2006-04-astronomers-alcohol-cloud-spanning-billion.html " said Green. "I'm godo modrater" said Fake anon. "Fake anon is already drunk" said Meta, "he can't even handle a teaspoon of alcohol". Matt ushered Falco, Fake anon and Kimmo into the stasis chambers as he took command of the ship. "Don't you dare follow me, nobody except maybe Meta can talk about alcoholism. You fucks should have properly gendered me and cared about my second puberty!". Matt took the party into the cloud nebula as pure alcohol started filtering into the ship. "Tastes like raspberry shnapps!" said Green. "XD XD lol atheists checkmate" said Meta as he was the first to pass out. Nexi rammed his ship full thrust into the crew's ship. "This ship can't take much more" said Matt despondently. "Twatting bibles traffic cones" said Green, as he too passed out. "It is up to you and I Bert" said Matt as he took the ship out of the nebula and lit a cigar. "What's the matter? Can't handle your alcoholic nebula?" Nexi wined on the comm. "ba..dum....tss..it's dead Jim' Bert mumbled as he too passed out. "It's up to me" said Matt as he put his cigar into the torpedo tube and fired it, "yipee kye yay, motherfucker" he said as he set ablaze the whole nebula and thus wrecking Nexi...
End of Part One

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) triple-posted this 8 months ago, 5 days later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #773,046

@previous (Green !BEERiVqJJw)
The previous chapter is posthumously dedicated to the memory of Nexus. RIP.

Anonymous D joined in and replied with this 8 months ago, 8 hours later, 1 week after the original post[^] [v] #773,139

@previous (Green !BEERiVqJJw)
weird timing. rip

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) replied with this 7 months ago, 1 week later, 3 weeks after the original post[^] [v] #776,079

Part 2: Showdown with Kimmo
Kimmo flew the party back to Earth and dropped the them off in Cornwall. "Now I'm stealing the ship and am going to conclude my evil plan". Ks was filled with rage, "no, how could you?". Meta did a little jig and slapped his bum "why don't you just kill us now?" he asked. "Psychotic fucktards!" shouted Kimmo, "that's not how it works!". Kimmo then flew off back to his own country of Swedenistan. "Kimmo has gone to far this time!" said Fake anon.
The party went to bed, but they woke up because the electricity went out. "Uh oh spaghettios!" said Matt, "what is going on". r04r stamped on a puppy, "Kimmo must be downloading electricity for his evil schemes" replied r04r, "no electrics will work". Green saluted the Union Jack, "we must get to Sweden" he said, "but we will need to get through the evil EU!". SUDDENLY, a guy started skateboarding down a hill, "climate change doesn't real!" he shouted. "It is DasSheeple!" squealed Becky excitedly, "he is one of the most intelligent minichanners and will help us fight the oppressive EU bastards!". Green nodded, "but what about the Muslims in Sweden?". Suddenly, a guy started running with a Union Jack and snorted cocaine off of books. "It is Svet!" said Fake anon excitedly, "he will destroy the whiny millennial libtard cucks in Sweden!". The party all cheered and r04r threw a wooden clog into the ocean and hit it with a biggening ray and the party got on and rode it towards Portugal...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) double-posted this 6 months ago, 3 weeks later, 1 month after the original post[^] [v] #780,669

The party boarded the clog boat and set sail for Sweden. "Anchors a weigh!" said Green triumphantly, "we will head west to Europe". The party started sailing the ocean o' blue when the ship started to become rickety. Suddenly, the party heard a whispering in the wind " thee, thy or eye". Meta was scare. A giant tsunami appeared over horizon. Matt looked on in horror, "it is the spirit of Syntax. He is possessing the sea sea sea"...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) triple-posted this 6 months ago, 8 minutes later, 1 month after the original post[^] [v] #780,670

"Fucking NHS hyper negoidal cunts" ranted Autphag as he wandered the streets looking for a doctor who would sell him hormones on the sly. Autphag searched high and low for a doctor as he brandished a knife. "My therapist will pay for the plot to thwart aspergia with their nefarious NHS Pythagoras theorems". Autphag found a black market and spotted a doctor. " Give me the fucking hormones you cunt!". The Doctor swivelled round, "I'm afraid I can't do that Mr Gillon. You are suffering from autism and not gender dysphoria", The Doctor pulled out a bottle of Domestos, "take your meds". Autphag made a moo, "that's it. Haselgrove will pay and so will the NHS". The Doctor called in his security team and a gang of Big Daddies Derek walked out of the alleyway. "Being this obsessed" the Big Daddies Derek said in unison. Autphag fleed, "if I can't be a woman, I will just have to turn everyone else in the world transgender!"...

Anonymous E joined in and replied with this 6 months ago, 5 minutes later, 1 month after the original post[^] [v] #780,671

@previous (Green !BEERiVqJJw)
Haha. I missed these.

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) replied with this 6 months ago, 3 minutes later, 1 month after the original post[^] [v] #780,672

Catherine was sitting in Hell, watching Adam Sandler movies. She went to the vending machine and bought a Pepsi which was made with aborted foetuses (fetuses in case Americans don't understand the word foetuses). Catherine then left her room and went to look for Satan. She went past demons who were playing snooker. She finally found Satan, sitting on his throne. "Satan, please make me your sex slave!" said Catherine
. Satan sighed, "for the last time Catherine, no. I am trying to run a business here!". Catherine cried, "at least can I get some fast food?" Satan laughed, "no, you can only eat salad and fruit. Fast food is only reserved for Fridays. The demons will give you a menu". Catherine did a little jig, "what about wrestling?" can I watch that?". Satan threw his ledger on the floor, "that is it. I have had enough of your whining. I am sending you back to the realm of the living. Demons, get my paperwork!"...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) double-posted this 6 months ago, 4 minutes later, 1 month after the original post[^] [v] #780,673

The party tried to ride the clog boat like a surfboard and ride the wave out. Matt looked ghastly, "even in death he can not stop being obsessed". McWalter tried to eat the wave but to no avail. The party surfed the wave, when suddenly a ghostly mile wide face of Syntax appeared from the water and started jitterbugging. Lasers started to shot at the clog boat. "He is possessing the 10 myle satellites as well!" said Meta. TTEH saluted the Queen, "I am British, naval is in my blood!" TTEH sailed the boat to France and the party disembarked...

Big Daddy Derek !Uvm54ORbmo joined in and replied with this 6 months ago, 4 days later, 1 month after the original post[^] [v] #781,605

@780,670 (Green !BEERiVqJJw)
The Big Daddies Derek can confirm that this is an accurate portrayal of events.

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) replied with this 6 months ago, 1 week later, 2 months after the original post[^] [v] #784,006

Suddenly, a truck of peace drove at the party and nearly did kill them, the driver yelling "Allahu Akbar!". TTEH shook his head, "France are cucked, glad we're leaving the EU!" he said as he high fived Green. Suddenly, Angela Merkel appeared out of the Eiffel Tower taking President Macron for a walk. "I hate you British punks!" Merkel said as she pulled out a gun, "zieg heil!" she yelled as she shot at the party. Matt invoked the spirit of Trump, "grab them by the pussy!" he said. Matt grabbed Merkel by the pussy asking if it was tight or not because he had not had many vaginas before. All he grabbed was a ball though. "It can't be!" said Meta, "lets see who you really are!", Meta approached Merkel and took off her mask. "It's Hitler!". "Literally Hitler!" added Falco. Fake anon became furious as he summoned a plague of locusts to chase Hitler. "Hitler did nothing wrong!" yelled DasSheeple, "Holohoax!". DasSheeple skated and joined Hitler. "Climate change is a myth!" shouted DasSheeple. "What can we do?" asked TTEH frantically. Svet snorted a line of cocaine and started to run around in circles. He then started to summon his flat, which un-evaporated around Hitler. "Haha, got em!" said Svet gleefully, "they will not be able to leave my flat until it depreciates in value to £250k. They are trapped!" the party celebrated and headed towards Brussels, Belgium...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) double-posted this 6 months ago, 7 minutes later, 2 months after the original post[^] [v] #784,007

I am back to the mortal world!" said Catherine gleefully. Catherine started walking towards Wendy's when Autphag bumped into him. "A gang of Big Daddies Derek are coming to do the Haselgrovian auto-gentrification aspergia!" said Autphag. "You need some hormones" said Catherine, "I have recently been prescribed hormones". The Big Daddies Derek marched in unison down the hill with Domestos, one of the Big Daddies Derek loaded a super squirter with Domestos and shot at Catherine's Nintendo Switch, >"bawwww, muh nintendoes" said the Big Daddy Derek. Autphag and Catherine ran away. "We must form a transgender alliance!" said Autphag, "then we will head to Sweden and steal Kimmo's technology"...

Killer Lettuce🌹 !!iNo3FkiZx replied with this 6 months ago, 28 minutes later, 2 months after the original post[^] [v] #784,008

@784,006 (Green !BEERiVqJJw)
@previous (Green !BEERiVqJJw)
Hahaha. Funny stuff.

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) replied with this 5 months ago, 2 weeks later, 2 months after the original post[^] [v] #787,049

The party stopped for philosophical reflection, "I were doing a poo" said Fake anon. "I done a wee wees" added Matt. "Fishy fishy foos" saif TTEH flapping his arms, "do the noo noos?". Matt winked and pointed to the stars, "the wee wums are doing a poos up your bums". Fake anon started to spin around on his dreidel, "moo moos are coming out my bum :)". Svet snorted cocaine, "value my flat, value my cat". Ks also had a heroic heart as he sat defiantly, the waterfall felt the bliss. "Hurrr, muh nintendoes" interjected Falco. "Scoobies, scoobies skishlabees" said Green as they ventured forth...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) double-posted this 4 months ago, 1 month later, 3 months after the original post[^] [v] #796,113

Green Green.

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) triple-posted this 4 months ago, 8 minutes later, 3 months after the original post[^] [v] #796,115

"We are nearing Swedecuckistan" said Svet with trepidation. Svet took out his iPhone, "no!" he shouted, "Hitler is seriously devaluing my flat, it has dropped below £300k now". " Zieg heil!" said a voice from the bushes. "Hitler has escaped from your flat!" said TTEH. Suddenly, Hitler was hitted with wooden clogs. "I'm gay lol" said a voice. "It is Dreamworks!" cheered Green. Dreamworks did the jig. "I'm gay lol" said Dreamworks as he held up a poster of Geert Wilders. DasSheeple skated and hit Dreamworks with his skateboard and Dreamworks took out a giant clog and they dueled. Hitler laughed. "I have my greatest weapon to unleash". Suddenly the party heard a groaning, "remain in the EU and vote Tory". Fake anon gasped and was aghast, "my G-d, it is Killer Lettuce. And zoiks, he is a zombie"...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) quadruple-posted this 4 months ago, 52 seconds later, 3 months after the original post[^] [v] #796,116

"How do we transgender?" asked Carherine. Autphag sperged out, "we must get a plane!" xe said. The duo got a plane and it flewed and landed. "We are in Thailand", said Autphag, " we must find a man prancing about Bangkok in a victorian opera cape. Suddenly, Catherine heard music, "here we go! Rocking all over the world!" the lyrics went. "Is that-" stuttered Catherine, "yes" cut in Autphag, "it is dad rock. We must follow the sound of the dad rock to find the one they call, TG". The duo followed the sound of the dad rock and came across a man with a harem of thai ladyboys. "Are you the one they call, TG?" asked Autphag. TG smiled, 'you seem upset" he said. Catherine shook xer head, "no no, we just want to become real women". TG laughed, "you're as fake as the moon landings". Autphag shouted, "negroidial celts zealously the antihistamines other big words to make me look smart". TG twirled his cape and span around. " My, my, looks like we really riled you up :)". Autphag pounded the floor, "The Doctor was right, this is hopeless, we will never be women". A tint of obsession appeared on TG's face. "The Doctor, you say? That filthy fucking nonce should fuck off back to his pedo hugbox Tinychan. I will gladly help you become women if we can thwart that weirdo". The Transgender Trio rejoiced and got on a blimp...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) quintuple-posted this 4 months ago, 50 seconds later, 3 months after the original post[^] [v] #796,117

Green went to stand with Killer Lettuce. "Green, what are you doing?" asked TTEH. "I am betraying Brexit!" shouted Green. The Owl and TTEH spilt their tea, "you bastard". Suddenly The Queen fell out of the sky. "It is 6 o'bong" decreed The Queen. Green then patted Hitler on the shoulder but it was a double cross because it was a sticky with C4 in it. Then Green winked at The Queen and The Queen pushed a detonator and blew up Hitler. "It was my plan all along" said Green. The Owl and TTEH cheered while Svet summoned his flat to take them the rest of the way to Sweden. "I'm having a cigarette" said Postmortem. "No" said Svet, "that will decrease the value of my flat". Ks took out his meth pipe, "can I smoke meth?", Svet nodded, "yes. That will increase the value of my flat". The party then entered Sweden...

bert's imaginary peeps joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 8 minutes later, 3 months after the original post[^] [v] #796,118

needs more bert!

Killer Lettuce🌹 !!iNo3FkiZx replied with this 4 months ago, 53 minutes later, 3 months after the original post[^] [v] #796,133

@796,115 (Green !BEERiVqJJw)
@796,116 (Green !BEERiVqJJw)
@796,117 (Green !BEERiVqJJw)
Hahaha! Hilarious stuff, m8.

I must give you particular praise, once again, on your ability to write characters. Myself and TG are written just like we act IRL, it's uncanny.

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) replied with this 4 months ago, 4 days later, 4 months after the original post[^] [v] #797,286

"We must traverse the lovely woods" said Fake anon. The party ventured in the lovely woods, when exploding lolis started running at them. Ks aimed his gun at the little girls when he started having flashbacks of Vietnam.

Flashback scene: "Colonel, we can not shoot them. They are just children" said Ks. The colonel pulled the trigger on his assault rifle and shot the Vietnamese children. They exploded. "If we do not shoot them first they will blow us all up".

Ks blew up lolis with his photon cannon. "It is the only way" said Ks. Suddenly a ghost appeared out of the ground. It was the ghost of Mara. "No, there is another way. I am guardian of these lovely woods, I will teach them the meaning of the moon. You may proceed".
The party proceeded through the lovely woods and made it to Stockholm...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) double-posted this 4 months ago, 45 seconds later, 4 months after the original post[^] [v] #797,287

Satan was filing his business expenses, when suddenly God appeared. "Satan, I'm afraid I have some bad news" said God, "I'm closing down Hell". Satan was aghast, "what, why?" he stuttered. God pulled out a poster, "I need this space for my new Heaven theme park". Satan stood up, "I must protest, I am trying to run a business here. Where will all the tormented souls go?". God shook his head, "they will all be transferred to Heaven's dungeons". Satan flipped his desk, "this is unacceptable. Where will I go?". God smiled, "you will be warden of the dungeons". Satan shook his head, "I will not go from being Emperor of Hell to warden of some musty old dungeon! These terms are unacceptable!". God tutted, "I will give the warden job to Muhammed (peace be upon him) then". Satan gasped, "you made a deal with Allah? Have you gone insane!". God laughed manically, "yes. We are business partners now, he knows his stuff. And I'm afraid, Hell's closed"...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) triple-posted this 4 months ago, 1 week later, 4 months after the original post[^] [v] #799,170

Suddenly, a rocket nearly blew up the party and a truck narrowly missed them. "We are definitely in Stockholm" said Svet. The party put on their army made of bacon, but Killer Lettuce refused because he thought it was Islamophobic. Ks loaded the Baconinator and fired sausages at the Muslims. "A critical hit" exclaimed Fake anon, "it is super effective!" he said chewing on a sausage. Fake anon then span on a dreidel and caused Kosher damage to the Muslims. TTEH drew a picture of Mohammed and the rest of the Muslims blew themselves up. "There it is" said Green, "Anontalk Towers". Flashbacks haunted Green and Falco of when they were there in the original Falco Fanfic. Svet mixed some cocaine and meth and he and Ks snorted it and got pumped up. Postmortem lit up a cigarette. "LETS DO IT!" the party shouted. Grammar Nazis surrounded the party as they approached the Towers. The party took cover as the grammar Nazis threw semi-colons and adjectives at the party. Killer Lettuce threw an exploding pasty at them and Falco threw his Halo at one, decapitating him. "Spambots!" yelled DasSheeple, the spambots walked in unison and one shot Fake anon's penis, circumcising him. "There are too many, fall back" shouted TTEH. Suddenly, a voice was heard in the horizon, "I think it is!". "It can't be..." gasped Postmortem, "it are the Big Daddies Derek". The Big Daddies Derek walked up to the spambots, lead by their leader, The Doctor. "What is your favourite Star Track episode? Do you have a Sony Atari 720? Bawww, muh nintendoes" said the Big Daddies Derek. The spambots replied with, "you sir, are and idiot :/". The spambots tried to spam the Big Daddies Derek, while the Big Daddies Derek continues their campaign of shtick until the spambots finally blew up. The party cheered and they finally entered Anontalk Towers, ready to confront Kimmo...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) quadruple-posted this 4 months ago, 32 seconds later, 4 months after the original post[^] [v] #799,171

Kimmo was in the middle of some large high tech hallway that sort of looked like a cathedral. "Psychotic fucktards!" shouted Kimmo, "you will never stop me!". Fake anon was having an angry bar mitzvah, "what are you planning, Kimmo? Why did the power go out or whatever happened, I can't remember a few chapters ago and I am not going back to reread them?!". Kimmo chortled a maniacal evil laugh. "The life is so sad! I am diverting all the power in Europe to my doomsday device and blowing up the world! I have already sent rocketfuls of lolis to the Moon, where I will join them and be the emperor of a new civilization!". The party raged, "that's a bit cliché, don't you think?" queried The Doctor. Kimmo chuckled evilly, "sometimes the classics are the best". Falco casted Thundaga and wounded Kimmo. " Trivial" said Kimmo, "now you will face one of my greatest evil androids". Suddenly a robot descended on thrusters, "strong and stable" said the robot. "No" said TTEH and Green in unison, "it is the evil Tory Maybot!"...

Anonymous H joined in and replied with this 4 months ago, 5 hours later, 4 months after the original post[^] [v] #799,203

10/10..

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) replied with this 3 months ago, 4 days later, 4 months after the original post[^] [v] #799,980

The Maybot ran up to Killer Lettuce and threw him against the wall and started kicking him "I'd still vote for her" he said. TTEH and Green started shouting profanities but May censored them "think of the Children!" she yelled. "You are a tyrannical, authoritarian witch!" shouted Green. May just chortled uncontrollably. "She is malfunctioning lol" said Falco. Suddenly a ghost train drove through Anontalk Towers and out jumped a man. "Sorry I'm late, the train was packed in there. Maybe we should nationalise the railways" he said winking. "It's future Prime Minister Jeremy Corbyn said TTEH enthusiastically. Corbyn ran up to the Maybot and punched her in her ugly authoritarian face. Then Corbyn used his signature move, free tuition fees. The Maybot took critical damage, but she summoned fox hunters to take out Corbyn. Corbyn calped up his friends from Houmous to blow up the Maybot. "No, I can rebuild her!" shouted Svet as he summoned his flat and disappeared. Corbyn put on his hat, "now, if you'll excuse me, I have a country to save"...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) double-posted this 3 months ago, 42 seconds later, 4 months after the original post[^] [v] #799,981

"Psychotic fucktards!" roared Kimmo, "I will shitlist you forever!". Kimmo set the timer on the Doomsday device. "10 minutes to detonation" said a robotic voice. Kimmo then ran into a giant robot mech suit what looked like the one in the pic related. "You psychotic fucktards will feel the wrath of the Kimmonator!". Kimmo swiped his robot claw at Fake anon, cutting off his foreskin. Matt threw a pipebomb at the Kimmonator but he just ate it. Postmortem managed to grab one of the Kimmonator's claws and tried to break it, but it was no good, it was made of titanium. The Kimmonator flung Postmortem across the room. Suddenly, r04r descended into the base with a cyborg. "Jan!" said Matt and Green. "You stop the doomsday device, Jan and I will deal with the Kimmonator. Green and Falco immediately ran up to the Doomsday device. "beanis :/" said Falco as he opened a tin of beans. Falco and Green ate the beans. They then took of their trousers (pants) and rubbed their butts. Luckily they were wearing nylon underwear, which caused a static build up. Then the beans kicked in. "SHOCK SHARTS!" they shouted as they sprayed sloppy diarrhea shit all over the Doomsday device. But it was no use. It kept ticking. Then Matt had an idea. He threw some McDonald's fries in the device and it summoned the McWalter entity. "Dinner!" said McWalter as he ate the shit encrusted Doomsday Device. His stomach being a black hole would contain the explosion. The party cheered, but Kimmo was having a rage bulletin...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) triple-posted this 3 months ago, 33 seconds later, 4 months after the original post[^] [v] #799,982

Kimmo threw r04r through the ceiling? Falco plugged in his tailmdikdomand helicoptered his penis, spinning around. Fake anon also span, but it didn't even make Kimmo dizzy. Ks fired metheors at Kimmo but it was no use. "His power level is over 9000" winked Fake anon as Killer Lettuce sighed. "We must summon him" said Jan, sucking on a fat nigger cock, "we must summon Moot". Matt drew a pentogram on the floor and the party fired their lasers and opened a can of soup. Up through pentrogram came Moot. Moot had an army of oldfags with him and they managed to topple Kimmo over and then disappeared. Kimmo stepped out of his broken robot. "That's it. I give up!" he bellowed, "you psychotic fucktards don't give up. Do you know why I am so evil? It is because I have been oppressed by fucktarded antis for so long. All I want is to have a loving relationship with a loli and take her to the lovely woods. What is wrong with that? You have to ask yourself, who is the real monster here?". Matt stepped forward, "it is over, Kimmo". Kimmo bowed his head, "you're right. I will retire from the life of villainry and correct grammar and focus on my crappy games and drawing pictures of Mohammed. I will only use my powers if good from now on". The party cheered, but the celebrations were short-lived as a sound of gunshot echoed around the chamber. "Kimmo!" shouted Ks, running forward. Kimmo clutched his chest as blood poured out...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) quadruple-posted this 3 months ago, 3 weeks later, 5 months after the original post[^] [v] #804,903

Green ran over to Kimmo, "Kimmo, no!" shouted Green in despair. "Wipe your shitty British arse!" replied a voice. The party turned around to see a man prancing about in a victorian opera cape and holding a smoking gun. "TG!" exclaimed Matt, "you shot Kimmo. How could you?". TG just laughed, "you seem upset :)". Matt clenched his hands in fists of rage. "You have killed the world's greatest troll". TG twirled his cape, "now I am the world's greatest troll". Postmortem pulled out his shotgun and tried to shoot TG as he pranced off into the distance. "Dammit" said Matt. The party gathered around Kimmo. "Psychotic, fucktards" whispered Kimmo, "I must not let this technology fall into the wrong hands" he said as he pushed a button. "SELF DESTRUCT COUNTDOWN ACTIVATED. THE BASE WILL SELF DESTRUCT IN 5 MINUTES!" sounded an alarm. "I have set the self destruct timer. You have 5 minutes. Ride the Mootercycle to the outskirts of the town, there you will find the Kimmocopter. Fly it out of here. The entire town of Stockholm will blow up". Fake anon had a worry, however "but thousands of innocent Muslims will die". Kimmo smirked, "yes". The whole party cheered. "Go in peace, Kimmo" said Green. Kimmo looked up at the sky and drew a final breath, "I am. Shitlisted." he gasped as he passed away...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) quintuple-posted this 3 months ago, 1 hour later, 5 months after the original post[^] [v] #804,911

END OF PART 2

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) sextuple-posted this 3 months ago, 2 days later, 5 months after the original post[^] [v] #805,710

PART 3: h

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) septuple-posted this 3 months ago, 33 seconds later, 5 months after the original post[^] [v] #805,711

h

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) octuple-posted this 3 months ago, 25 seconds later, 5 months after the original post[^] [v] #805,712

END OF PART 3

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) nonuple-posted this 2 months ago, 6 days later, 5 months after the original post[^] [v] #807,111

PART 4
Anontalk Towers started falling apart around the party. "Get on" said Ks as he got on the Mootorcycle. The party got on the Mootorcycle and he drove through a tunnel. Suddenly Jihadis appeared alongside the Mootorcycle. Ks threw the party some bacon. The Jihadis launched a rocket and narrowly missed the party. Indy managed to throw some bacon at the van and made it crash. Suddenly a skater bum appeared skating down the tunnel, swinging a link sausage whip. "It is DasSheeple" said Postmortem enthusiastically. DasSheeple hit the Jihadi vans with his sausages, causing critical damage. The party drove through the forest with the Jihadi vans still on their tale. The Mootorcycle veered around the woods "Allah Akbar" said the Muslim drivers as they crashed their vans into trees. The party finally got out of the woods and onto the outskirts of Stockholm. Suddenly a rocket launcher hit the Mootorcycle, causing it to break down. Muslims started surrounding the party, armed with bombs. "We are finished" said Ks. Suddenly, the ground started to tremble. There was a silent sound. It sounded like...."it can't be!" said Fake anon. An hulk of a man came barging through the Muslims "Trump..is my President..suck it up" he said. "Yay it's Bert". Bert winked. He then opened a bottle of everclear and picked up cars, throwing them into the Muslims. "Get to da choppa!" shouted Matt as the party ran for the Kimmocopter. The party reached it in time as Bert stumbled aboard. "Warp 6, engage!" said Meta. "My favorite Star Track quote" replied a Big Daddy Derek. Ks flew the narrowly helicopter narrowly away as Stockholm blew up exponentially, killing millions of Muslims...

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) decuple-posted this 2 months ago, 2 weeks later, 6 months after the original post[^] [v] #811,292

PART 6: minichan.org and the Curse of the TRannies!!!
The party cheered. "Where to now?" asked Fake anon, doing winkings. Matt smiled, "we must get to Cornwall". Ks flew to Cornwall and flew to the minichan bar. The party went in and drank Tesco Value Cider. "What do we do about Killer Lettuce?" asked Fake anon, "he is still zombie. Suddenly r04r walked in and shoved a spike into Killer Lettuces head and downloaded him into a pasty. "Here you go" she said, "he is a hologram or whatever again, I just don't give a shit anymore" and she walked out. Suddenly a newsflash appeared on TV and the party noticed a man prancing about in a victorian Opera cape. "HELLO!" said the man on TV, "I am The Gash. I have a mind beam ray thingy I stole from Kimmo. I am going to turn everybody in the world transgender. You seem upset :)". Matt slammed his fist on the counter, "that dastardly bastard. We must stop him". Green nodded, "indeed we must". Falco's crappy iPhone began ringing and he went outside to take the call. When he got back in, he had a solemn look on his face. "That was my Doctor. The test came back positive. I have testicular cancer"...

Killer Lettuce🌹 !!iNo3FkiZx replied with this 2 months ago, 1 hour later, 6 months after the original post[^] [v] #811,312

@previous (Green !BEERiVqJJw)
Oh shit! Is it time to call in kook?

Green !BEERiVqJJw (OP) replied with this 2 months ago, 1 week later, 6 months after the original post[^] [v] #815,103

"We will all take a break to rest up for the upcoming battle with TG and the tranny freaks" said Ks. The party nodded and all got in their cars. Green and Falco drove back to the Cider Chateau and Falco cried. "I can't believe I have cancer" cried Falco. Green put a comforting arm around him, "hush, we'll get through this". Falco stood up, went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror, " NOOOO!!!" he shouted as he punched the mirror and it shattered to the floor. "What are you doing? I was going to break that mirror by throwing a bottle of cider at it!". Falco broke down on the floor, "don't you see Green? The only way to stop it spreading is to remove my testicle! I will not be a man anymore!". Green shook his head, " a man isn't defined by his number of balls, he is defined by what he does. You are a hero to the whole planet. That makes you pretty manly in my eyes. I will be with you through every step of your chemo"...

Green !BEERiVqJJw joined in and replied with this 1 month ago, 3 weeks later, 7 months after the original post[^] [v] #822,766

"I must have Salty" snarled Leonidas. Leonidas turned off his Sonic Boom DVD and summoned Chris. "His arms are blue!" sperged Chris. Leonidas flapped his arms in excitement, "fire up the Autismobile. We need to find that fucking soulless ginger midget". Leonidas put on his safety helmet and kneepads and then he went to the freezer. " I saved it for dire situations like this" said Leonidas as he pulled out a vial with his fingers, "a small amount of the autism virus. If I turn Salty autistic, she'll have to marry me!"...

Green !BEERiVqJJw double-posted this 1 month ago, 5 minutes later, 7 months after the original post[^] [v] #822,767

With the party rested, they started their journey to San Francisco where they combobulated that the Gay Ray would come from. "We must..stop those yranny freaks..for Trump" said Bert. The party concurred. "Transgenderism is permissible in Islam! I can't wait until the Muslims take over Britain!" chirped Killer Lettuce. Fake anon donned his Yarmulke. "I am a Jew". The party cheered and drove to the airport where they hijacked a plane and flew to America. They landed in San Francisco but trouble was immediately brewing. "This entire town is gay" said Matt...

Green !BEERiVqJJw triple-posted this 1 month ago, 2 days later, 7 months after the original post[^] [v] #823,654

Trannies and homos started to close in on the party. Ks injected meth into his testicles and threw them down the steep roads. "Stop" shouted a homo freak, "this is offensive". Falco and Green laughed as they started rubbing theiy're balls together which generated static electricity. They then electrocuted the gays with their balls. "Take that you gays", said Green. Matt threw some grenades blowing up trannies' penis, "I just saved you money for an op" he winked cheekily. "That's money you owe me for your debt" shouted a voice. "It is Reid" said Fake anon. "I have come for my vengeance, Matt". The trannies started to overwhelm the party. Suddenly a Hummer drove over and two black men got out. "Need our help?" asked Henn. Fake anon shook his head, "we don't need the help of no filthy niggers!". The party gasped in shock, "that is too far" said Ks. Henn took out his AK-47 and circumcised Fake anon's penis by shooting it. "Black lives matter" shouted Henn. Kanye West punched some trannies in the boobs and started rapping. "Even with Henn and Kanye's help, it is no use. The trannies are too numerous" said Green. "DID someone say trannies?" said a voice as a mysterious figure dressed in black leather approached the party...
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